Things had to get difficult at some point

So I figured it was time to update...a lot has been happening. At this point in time I am really frustrated with this school and the program. I know things work very differently in Chile, but even as my cooperating teacher acknowledges, thats why things are not progressing as well here as in other countries. Im tired of hearing phrases such as "It´s Chile" as an excuse or "be patient." They joke because I am American and want things accomplished now or done quickly, but maybe thats the reason our country has progressed the way it has. Many Americans have an urgency about them with their work, and here, not at all. I often hear "I´ll do it tomorrow," which is a very popular and well represented phrase in Chile. As for me, I am having trouble with the "be patient" part. Let me explain....

Several issues have come up since last week. Here at the school we had the anniversary celebrations (similiar to the homecoming activities in high school), and half my classes were canceled due to all this. I was not happy when few students actually ended up coming to the classes that were still going on. To top it off, I had a difficult time with many of the activities students were allowed to participate in for the anniversary celebration. . If you saw the pictures you would most likely agree. My colleagues were surprised by my shock, and I shared with them the reality of schools in the states. The movies we produce are not realistic, and they were shocked by the rules my high school had for the students. That is not all...

Last Friday was the formal ceremony for the school and a small after celebration at the school for the staff and some students. It was a nice setup. There were cakes and small appetizers, along with champagne and soda. Of course the champagne was for the adults, but when students are present problems can occur. A student in one of my classes came and stood behind me in the corner. I noticed he had one of the glasses for champagne, and it was empty. I told him that he was not supposed to be drinking. He asked for me to keep it a secret, laughed, and said that I was his friend. I had to make it clear to him that drinking at school is not permitted and I am his professor, not his friend. A coworker, my friend, told me to let it go, and that sometimes it happens. I was upset but did not want to create an issue at that moment. But what happened next made me furious. I watched an inspectora young man who works as one of the security guys (to maintain order and enforce rules at the school), hand a glass of champagne to a female student. I told my friend, who then told another inspector, Roberto. Roberto addressed this inspector and he denied it. Nothing happened after this. The issue was dropped! At that moment I decided I did not care about the excuse "it´s Chile." I could not stand by and participate in an activity where a member of the staff was doing something wrong and nothing was done. I walked, well probably kinda stormed, out of the room. Another teacher noticed I was upset and followed me out. I guess with my blonde hair and expressive face I cant leave unnoticed! I told her how I felt and stayed in the classroom for the rest of the celebration.

On Monday I had a meeting with the director. I expressed my dissatifaction with my classes, the disorganized, the inappropriateness of the anniversary activities, and the incident on Friday. I did this through my cooperating teacher as my translator. She encouraged me to talk with him (she agrees with me) and supported my decision. In regards to the activities, I even mentioned a point about how girls cannot value their bodies, or even the boys cannot value women, if they are allowed to behave this way. But of course even the director had some riduculous excuses for why they can do nothing about it, such as the media influence. To sum it up, he admitted they have no control over it even if they do not like it! I could not believe this was coming from an educated professional...but "it´s Chile!"

As for my classes, since there is lack of communication between teachers and students, they organized a meeting today with all the students who are supposed to be in my classes. Good thing I did not recognize over twenty of the students! So apparently now they know they are supposed to come, but will it happen? Secondly, I am so frustrated by the fact that now I will be getting new additions to my supposed "established classes" and Im going to have to continue reteaching material some students have already learned. This is a mess. Please pray for me to have patience.

Link to photos

If you have not had a chance to see my photos...here are the links. More to come!

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2018976&id=171700452&l=b1c171a9fa

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2018992&id=171700452&l=7e779871f7

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2019175&id=171700452&l=b6163eab2f

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2019176&id=171700452&l=abc0f8ecc9

Enjoy!

Wait...What???

That is what I am thinking quite often. What did you just say?? How am I supposed to do that?? The language barrier causes me to be confused often, but I am enjoying trying to understand what the heck people are talking about. Last night I went to a tea/farewell party with some of the teachers at my school. They love trying to communicate with me, either in English and VERY SLOW Spanish, but other times they just talk quickly to one another. They fill me in between topics. It is pretty funny when they are telling jokes and reach the punchline and everyone laughs...except me. I just say, "no entiendo nada." (and laugh of course)
My job here is going to be challenging, but also very rewarding. The more I have learned about my students and this school this week, the more I desire to help. The students here are in desperate need of attention, someone to care about them, and someone to tell them they are doing a good job. I loved having a new class everday because it gave me and opportunity to show each student that I am excited to work with them and I care about them and how they do in my class. At first the students were closed off (this is typical), but after being in my class for an hour I can happily say I was able to get some form of response from each student. Some laughed at me, others tried to answer my questions, and some just started to pay closer attention to what I was saying.
I must say it still surprises me sometimes how different things are here. I have seen some more girls in my school who are pregnant, and I finally asked how many total are in the school...the answer-21! OH. Its such a problem, but it just keeps going on. The kids in the private schools are the ones with the best education. Two teachers here teach at a local private high school, and the differences are noticeable. The students are more motivated, there are supplies for the students and teachers, and the class sizes are small. Sounds like some parts of the American education system. It´s frustrating, but it´s reality. I just hope to give some students here a boost in confidence, and maybe help some think of different possibilities for their lives. But that takes time, which I do not have here. Four months is going to go by so fast.....
Well Im definitely the talk of the school. People of course notice the blonde hair and green eyes, but its my actions that people are noticing most. The fact that I helped clean my own classroom and move computers people think is crazy. Apparently only the cleaning lady and the "big strong men" are supposed to do those things. I also helped clean off some of the desks of the writing and white out the students love to use. A man at the school was apparently so surprised by this he took a picture! He says he never sees the teachers do these things. Oh, and the fact I drink so much water. Its odd to everyone here. They drink a lot of tea, juice, and soda. I like to walk to and from school. I need the excercise, but this is not normal either. Many people drive or take collectivos! Hey, its only 7 minutes to school. I think I am ok with being the gringa loca. :)

My first week of teaching...or trying

Well let me back track to this weekend...so great! Much of the extended family came in town so they were all interested in talking with me so I got to practice listening and attempting to speak. I am understanding so much more of what is being said so Im excited about that. The family is quite large, but I love having the little kids around. We spent all day inside on Saturday just eating and talking, eating and talking. It was nice to get to know everyone better. We are now more comfortable with each other than when I first got here.
Sunday was my first holiday experience here, apparently there are a lot of them, so it was fun. It´s called Dia del Ninos, which is the day for the children. There was a festival or little fair in the plaza that I went to with some of the family and their children. I had a great time with the little ones and taking photos.

Yesterday was supposed to be my first day of teaching, but of course nothing was ready. A common saying in Chile is just to leave it for tomorrow (and their attitude towards work applies here). I have to push to get anything done. Initially they wanted to put me in the computer room which I did not find appropriate to teach, so they looked for another room. It is also stated in my volunteer contract I have to have my own classroom but it seems rules are flexible here as well. Yesterday morning I was shown my new classroom, which was also full of computers, but I was told I could make the decision on how the room looks and what I needed taken out and brought in. So I did! I said to take out most of the computers, I needed different desks and chairs, and I needed a white board. Ha Ha. I had about 6 different people working in that room throughout the day. I went home and changed so I could help, which they didnt really understand. Apparently as a teacher I let others do the dirty work. Hell no. I started moving stuff around. Once the computers were out and new tables were brought in, I noticed how much cleaning really needed to be done. The janitor, Senora Irma, was trying to clean with dirty rags from an old bucket with Clorox and water. I said I needed a mop. That took about 30 min. and many people to translate and discuss how I needed a mop and cleaning supplies. They thought I was crazy. I mentioned my asthma and they finally understood. Marcos, a young guy who works on the computers here, volunteered to take me to the store. We finally found a mop, rags, cleaning solution, and a bucket. Just guess how much that all cost. 25 dollars US! no wonder Irma cleans the floors with rags and a pole. ugh. so now im waiting to be reimbursed....
When I came back Irma was already cleaning the floor but I said I needed do to it again later. She didnt want me to clean. It was her job. Her and I are going to need to have a discussion...

Anyway, last night Marcos walked with me around town and showed me different places in Vallenar. It was really fun! I would have never found them on my own or known what they were for. His English is about at the same level as my Spanish, so we go back and forth. Jorge is another computer guy at school and they both want to make sure Im safe and know where to go.
Oh! Im getting lessons in Spanish from one of the Spanish profesores at my school so Im so excited. He is young, 28 years old, so its cool. I am going to help him with his English in return. And it doesn´t hurt that he is cute. Ha ha.

So as you probably could have guessed, I am talked about all over school. So when I showed up this morning and got my bucket and mop ready with the cleaning solution people looked at me like I was crazy. Irma gave me a lecture and took my bucket! I kept saying "But I want to clean!" and she keeps emphasizing it is her job. So we compromised, I mopped the floor, she cleaned the desks and computers. I have the nicest classroom in the school!
(And apparently now everyone knows I went walking around with Marcos last night. Man people know everything! They just talk!)

Well, they are probably a trillion little things I could discuss, but I should probably end it here. Thanks for reading!

so much to say...where do i start???

well i guess to start, i am safe in my "city" of vallenar. it is in the atacama region which is north of santiago. it is the driest desert in the world. so here it is now winter, so it is chilly at night and in the morning but a good temperature during the day. it is a mining town, for gold, and is self sufficient. the nearest "city" as they would classify it, is copiapo, which is two hours north. they have a decent size city, but it is not in the same terms as in the states. there are six high schools and a center of town where all the shops are and the restaurants. it is actually a very quaint place, and i do appreciate some parts of the lifestyle. yet many things are so different as you can imagine. but i will explain more on that later.
as for me, i am doing so much better than when i first arrived. after getting over the initial shock i think i am really going to love it here. instead of putting so much pressure on myself to be proficient in spanish, i will just learn as i go. even if that sometimes has to be slow. i really see that i may have a purpose here, which is frightening and exciting at the same time.
i have become part of a small group of teachers, most of which are the english teachers, but they have let me into their group. during once, or the chilean midday snack, we have tea and bread. Claudia calls it our tea group. she is adorable. she also has invited me to her home and to join some of the teachers in the morning for tea and bread before classes start. people form very tight knit groups here, so i am blessed that they are including me.
i have observed classes on tues and wed, as well as today, but i must say i am not learning anything from them. the classes seem to just be a place for students to come hang out with friends instead of be out in the workplace. there is not a lot of learning being done. i must say this is hard for me as i am torn between wanting so badly to educate these students yet finding no real purpose for most of them as their lives are already mapped out. maybe i am here to build up some confidence, as many students lack it, or give some students the opportunity to see they have other opportunities. or they can at least provide better for their children. i really do not know.
since i am the only person in the school with green eyes and blonde hair, lets just say i get a lot of looks. and whispers. and whistles. and comments. after one boy attempted to say hello to me, he whistled when i walked away, and i finally turned around and told him no. it was pretty funny. students here know some english in the written form, yet are not able to speak it. there is a missing link because they do not need to practice it. which brought up my question today with my teacher, why do you want them to know how to speak english? the best answer she could give me is because the government now mandates it. but for these kids, they will most likely never come across another english speaking person. they will not go to university, either because they cannot pass the entrance exam or it costs too much to go. even if they get into a public university, many of their families need them here.
my job here is to teach students who are motivated to learn (which is very few) and have a basic knowledge of english. the teachers are going to choose 3 students from each class, preferably with my input, to join one of my classes. so far it looks as if i will be teaching 2 classes each day, mon thru thurs, for 1 1/2 hours. i will be teaching basic and intermediate, but with these students i am not sure if there is much difference. some of the material they may be using could be comparable to what my 5th graders were doing back in the states. then on fridays i may do extracurricular activities. during the week i said i could be available to students for help and assist the music teacher with possibly putting on a program. i am supposed to be teaching 25 hours per week but that is not going to be possible with all the planning i need to do. i have some materials but the box that is supposed to be sent to me is not here yet. so right now i have a makeshift classroom, a board, and anything i can put together. time to get creative!!
Some things i have done so far: learned how to turn on the gas outside to heat the water for a shower, taken a collectivo to and from school (these may sound ridiculous but in a foreign country this is quite an accomplishment), found a computer that skype will work on!, had a conversation last night with my chilean mom and we understood each other in spanish, worked with the music teacher to help her pronounce english words in a song, listened to students sing their songs in english and help them with pronunciation (yes i sang some too) started formulating ideas for my classes, and tonight i have just been asked to speak at the local university to the engineering students. so i may have to talk in front of 50 people. and i have no idea what im supposed to talk about. haha. the thing i have learned here, NEVER EXPECT ANYTHING and you wont be dissapointed. and laugh. because otherwise, i might just end up crying. wish me luck!!!

Welcome to my classroom....

i work with high school students ages 14 to 19. its a low school many students would be considered poverty level. it is know to have violence and bullying. about 40 girls are mothers. some at just 14 years old. it is said about 5% of the students would even pass the college entrance exam. students just sit in class and talk. listen to music. and draw. one boy drew graffite for an hour and the teacher just sat and talked to me and said nothing. only a few students listen when the the teacher tries to talk over them. some do their work. most do not. the reality for these kids in they will just get through school raise families here. work here. and die here. im am trying to get ready for the biggest challenge of my life.i just have to start from scratch. basic lessons. nothing too hard. i have no materials that i know of so i am going to have to create my own. i have a board and chairs. i cant use the curriculum. they dont even understand it. all the materials and lesson ideas i received in my training are almost useless. the last volunteer said they really did not learn much. ugh. its gonna be just figuring it out by trial and error everyday.

oh. my. goodness.

since my last post, everything has been a whirlwind. i have a hard time remembering what i did last. on thurs many of us were able to buy tickets for the futbol (soccer) game between the university of chile and argentina. it was pretty fun to go, but definitely crazy. we took the metro to the farther parts outside of chile, then had to walk 20 min and finally found the stadium. the game was fun to watch but i got kinda bored and very tired so some of us left early. friday went as normal, well for most of the day. classes in the morning, and then we were to have our final dinner banquet at the hostel. unfortunately i found out the night before one of my friends i had gotten close to had been robbed and mugged the night before. he was sleeping at the hostel on friday but i was really worried in my classes. i wont go into more details of what happened because i dont need to worry anyone. i am perfectly safe, i just need to be smart. unfortunately he got into a bad situation. he came to the banquet with all of us but he was just semi aware of what was going on. whatever drugs he was given did not wear off for days. i spent all day saturday and the hostel trying to help him get things taken care of such as seeing a doctor and filing a police report. he met a wonderful chilean man named gino who was such a help in all this mess. from all the stress and events of the week i was exhausted. sunday was my last day in santiago, and i spent it looking around town at the sites i had not been able to see.
sunday night, my group, all of those who were going to the atacama region north of santiago loaded on a bus to take us to the bus station. when we got there we were the last to load the bus and 4 people from our group could not get their luggage on. they had to return to the hostel while the other 5 of us loaded the bus. if you can picture this, because i was too overwhelmed to get a picture, its a large double decker bus. the top has semi-camas, which are seats that partially lean back. that is where all the chileans sat. on the bottom were the camas, which was very spacious and had nice seat that fully reclined so we could sleep overnight. it was like first class on a bus. we left santiago at 1030 pm on sunday and on monday we arrived in copiapo at about 8 in the morning. other volunteers in the region and 2 coordinators met us at the station. we then headed to the ministerio de educacion in copiapo. there we had a wonderful welcoming and found out our host families were there to meet us. unfortunately since some of us were left in santiago, a few families were dissapointed. the teacher that i am working with at my school was there, along with the principal and another administrator i believe. my teacher speaks pretty good english, thank goodness, so it eased my mind. at this point i got another surprise. i truly was the only volunteer in my town, Vallenar. i had heard that on thursday but i was not certain. others had said i would have another volunteer with me. the second surprise- instead of teaching basico, or elementary, i was told i would be teaching high school! first thought-holy crap!
i must say i really cannot explain all the emotions running through my mind during this past week and most recently. its a mix of excitement, nervousness, frustration, and despair. lonliness also comes into play.
when i arrived in vallenar, 2 hours south of copiapo, i met my teacher´s mother, whom i am going to be living with, as well as her grandmother and cousin. the grandmother is a little scary since she only has one eye and is very fragile. haha. that sounds horrible doesnt it?
i had lunch and a meeting at the school shortly after i arrived. i met all the teachers and had to give a quick introduction of myself in spanish. i know it was horrible but at least i am partially nieve to how bad i am saying the phrases.
last night was very hard when i could not get skype to work at the internet cafe. i started crying there. i was just so overwhelmed and exhausted i broke down. my teacher took me to her sisters house to use the computer. it took awhile but i finally was able to talk to my mom! i have not been so happy to hear her voice in quite a while!
i got rest last night. today has been much better. i observed my first 3 english classes. that is another story all by itself which i will explain later. lets just say education here is comparable to inner city schools where no one is learning anything. i am going now to have tea with the other english teachers. i will try and post pictures on a blog soon. pics can explain more than i can! chao!